I had a crazy long round of EWCM this time, like last cycle. A couple of weeks of it! I also had the painful pressure like a balloon in my lower pelvis (both sides, though lingering more on my left, even now) for several days. Last cycle I had this and worried about it, but was relieved to have a normal ultrasound of my ovaries after I ovulated. I thought it couldn't have been to do with ovulation, then. But the same pain is back this time, and with the EWCM I wondered if it WAS actually to do with being about to ovulate. It's still there today, and I'm sure I ovulated yesterday, so I'm not sure... I will have to just make note of it and see. It's not normal! It's not my normal ovulation pain, but it's accompanied by some mild cramping, which IS my normal ovulation pain, so who can say.
My temps have been my usual pre-ovulatory temps for 31 days in a row, and this morning I got a spike into my post-ovulatory temp range, so I'm SURE. I need two more days of raised temps for my chart to confirm it though.
So, parsnips occurred 4 days before ovulation, and then again, bang on ovulation day, so if I was more fertile right now I would be extremely excited! :) BUT, my last luteal phase was a puny 4 days. It really needs to be approaching 10 days to sustain a pregnancy, and many are the times I've had a chemical pregnancy because although I've conceived, my luteal phase has simply been too short to allow implantation to complete. :( I feel pretty good about the chances of conception this cycle, but I think it is VERY unlikely that I can hang on to a teeny, rapidly-dividing ball of cells that could very well be rolling down my fallopian tube as I type this. I should probably try not to think about it - in any case it might NOT be happening! I just can't help but think about the positive possibilities though! :)
After my other babies, in ALL my other short luteal phase times, it has taken MANY cycles to go from 4 days to 10. My quickest progression was 4 days, 6 days, 6 days, and then 10 (chemical pregnancy), then pregnant. Going by my past history I could hope for a 6 day luteal phase this cycle, maybe.
Even though there is hardly any chance, I am SO EXCITED that I could have conceived! :) My pregnancy tests are sitting almost expired in the bathroom cupboard, leftover from when I tested positive with Lydia, and I long to actually have a reason to use them again, every time I open the cupboard to get other mundane things out! To have actually had parsnips during a real fertile stage is really exciting, after all this time of no cycles. :)
I have no idea what a bigger age gap would be like! I'm used to 16-19 month age gaps - all of my children are that number of months apart. The shortest gap I could have now, is if I were somehow pregnant this cycle - this month is when I conceived Lydia two years ago, so the baby would be due the in October again, probably a couple of weeks before Lydia's 2nd birthday. A two year age gap seems strange to me now, even though it's a really typical gap for most people. It's not something I've done before - it seems a really big gap, lol! And since I'm unlikely to be able to sustain a pregnancy this cycle or next, it will be an even bigger gap if I'm blessed with another baby.
This morning, right before I took my temperature to find a spike, I woke from a really weird, vivid dream. I dreamt that I realised I must be pregnant, and so I went for a scan to see how far along I was. The scan was so vivid, like really being there. The lady told me I had two empty sacs, both torn and "billowing" (lol, no idea why my brain creates such bizarre descriptions in my dreams!), and one sac with a live baby, measuring 12 weeks and 5 days. She didn't show me the screen, so I couldn't get a glimpse of the nub - I remember wishing she would! ;) The feelings were so real - I was so shocked that I had conceived and carried triplets, and heartbroken that two of them were lost already. I was also scared - where did they go? I hadn't been bleeding, and I hadn't passed anything, and I wondered if they were somehow hiding and were still to be passed. Weird dream. Then I woke up. I haven't had a pregnancy dream in a while.
Okay, I need to make lunch for the family now, so I will go. I just had to update here - it's my go-to place for rambling irrationally (or rationally, on occasion!) about things related to cycles and babies and such. I will update again soon.